god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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