using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
