Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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