Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
