Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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