I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
