Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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