its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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