she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
