with your own penis?
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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