No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
