Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Randomize
