if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
