Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
you would pick up someone in the library
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
