Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
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