Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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