How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
