fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
