My nipple is on Facebook.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
