dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
This is classic penis vs brain.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Randomize
