Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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