Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
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