YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
