I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
