wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
