so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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