So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
