forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
