1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
