I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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