They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
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