i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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