i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
