So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
