dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Randomize
