Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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