Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
