That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
