I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Randomize
