I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
