He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I'm at about main and main street
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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