sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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