...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
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