Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
