as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
