We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
