Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
