I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I've blown a few things in my day
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
