I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
