Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Randomize
